The Heart Never Lies

Just chat with one of my net friends last night and she mentioned sth "i realised that you've been watching videos * as in dramas, shows, movies* non stop lately , kinda crazy eh "
and earlier she wrote "blissful , it's when the one you love , coincidently happened to love you as well." .....So, i clearly wasnt crazy , im blissful lol course those movies i love, they keep bumping in towards me this week =D im so fxxkin'glad hahahaha

Ive watched quite a few movies recently, some olds some news......some bad some good
Im putting DEAR JOHN at first as it strucked my inner feelings, it inspired me and brought up some thoughts in my mind . It's certainly not a perfect movie , though it's something so common in our life , something that you might actually have experienced before .A few parts were dull as this shows parts of our life, ie every sunday having the same menu which is lasagna and a table of 2 quiet persons with the sound of colliding forks and plates .....it sounded totally boring ....but every pieces of these details sums up a romantic love story, the process which makes people grow up, makes people change and learn , the loss and gain .

Actually,


Best line from the movie that I love is "I will see you then"
It was very cute when this was how that got them into a 2nd date....every time when parting from a date , they would say this to each other. I will see you then .....tells you how eager and anxiously ya looking forward to seeing him or her SOON. In this story,in the beginning, this is the sweet line depicts the couple intimacy ...their feelings grew so much stronger within just 2 weeks .....you also can see it from that kissing in the rain lol

From the great frictions btw them,the physical contact moved to only WORDS.
During LDR , other than msn, email , calls, writing letters is possibly the oldest method as it seems. John serves the army , he could only write letters to Savannah. Back and forth , this stayed for a year....and a while later after a year...she engaged with another guy and totally broke his heart. He's just then been extending the serving years again and again , not until he received the news of his dad in severe stroke. ...

I actually like the way how they connect their love with words in the letters.
It's sweet ....
I wonder how many people still doing this thingy, write letters for ya friends? lol
they will laugh at u and recommend ya email and skype lol
of course, those are so much better and faster = efficient +instant
but man, i would really luv the feeling of receiving it once in a blue month
Reading it back during ya leisure time, or having one stack in an old box ,open it up when ya old XD Letters are great =D



This is life....typical story line
people who are meant to be together , undergo a twist in fate and in the end , after the time makes you older * i mean more mature hahaha.....the two would come together finally.
Again, dont expect promises gonna work.

lol okay, done making fun of the big old jacket ? faded brown cloth around u and whats with that greenish flowery tie ....it's old style....
back to 19 sth lol.....heres this scary movie .....its a NICE MOVIE
I drifted away in the middle part**was hyper unexciting when interrogating some ppl * though i was terrified by some ugly and horrible make up on the kid and a guy also a woman ==.....blood covering faces ,zig zag scars stamped on the face...
Everything, for the 80 minutes i would say, whatever you were watching was all his hallucinations , he had been repeating this acting over and over agn. He created a few characters , got himself a name acted as a marshal , his partner from the picture was actually his doctor ....he came into this shutter island for one reason to find out the person who got his wife killed in a fire...shutter island , an island that keeps this place for psychopathic patients, mental disorder with criminal records.There were 67 or 68 severely dangerous patients living there.

From the movie, you realise , truth kills a person, truth takes a life away from a person.
Not everyone can handle grief stricken news, when something is out of your control and way beyond your acceptance limit, thats where insanity comes in .
You got no idea about what ya'll be doing next. Ya not yaself anymore. You Break with the truth.
THE TRUTH HURTS.
His wife drowned 3 of his children. wanted to dry the kids and keep them as puppet.
He fired his wife in the stomach ....and himself gone crazy....
Lies Make One Feels Better He played another role to revenge for his wife ,to find the man who burnt his house, faking up stories about a woman drowned 3 of her kids in the lake ....whatever he had done now became none of his business. He's in a completely new role, new identity,new person, who tried to prove that this shutter island evilly carried out brain operation to control their behaviors .
Scary huh....a person who's living under his own lies . Repeating his mind play over and over again.



Tooth fairy is great, great comedy and seriously, we should dream for the things we wish for . Believe the " if " ,hopes and confidence where they will lead you to success =D
LOL funny tho, seeing the rock wearing that tooth fairy costume lol luckily they allow add on gadgets lol the hockey garments make him look so much better


both of these share kind of the same stories, about zeus, poseidon and heidis ==
both are bad ==
but the worst is percy jackson and olympian:the lightning thief
Another point they share the same !!! only one or two beauties in the shows == wtf
perck jackson : flow of story sucks !!! so unorganized and so simply bypassing the events of stories, the fighting, as in the skills of playing with the swords sucked big time !!! they really need to work on that .....urgh.. poor production!!! pros: some ideas are cool, or magic power ,those are awesome creative ideas but stories are badly produced or conveyed ==

clash of titans....dull and what perplexed me was that isnt perzeus the son of poseidon?

3rd DAY - SUNDAY

This is a much better sunday if you compare this with last Sunday, u should know what i mean
Me and my family HAD breakfast at OLDTOWN
Then we went to the guitar store so that my bro can switch to a better place, to get a better tutor to speed up his learning, his previous one sucked !!!!!
So ,he already registered and actually was advised to get a 1k plus guitar. I was so turned on lol as in bloody excited if my bro really get one , the sound 's definitely gonna be much greater
Anyhow, hes not getting it now , im pretty sure, its just matter of time *winks
Besides, he's learning classical =D& i finally bought guitar picks =p

So.....This is my new lappie + my current fav desktop background
One piece pumps my blood whenever i watch it...
i certainly prefer the colourful lively graphics rather than the black and white manga,
even though it tells stories faster =)
I was watching OP last night , *it makes me smile ~~~~*

Before starting my long long long rambling , I'm just gonna have a short brief about what are the few things I would previously like or hope to blog about after my common habit of abandoning the blog for "some time".

1. Display some photos of the unboxing of Dell New Inspiron 15 *Yeah, i got a new lappie =)
2. Show the drawings i did during office hours
3. ** Friends gathering -yumcha( Twice ) Should have a lot to talk about
   
4. Nice shots on today's Qing Ming using my phone *even thou i trapped long hours in the jam inside the graveyards
   

These were the blog posts in my mind ....and right now they shattered.....
Due to my phone's problem, pics taken only part of them in my memory card....so, no1 & no2 are out !!! It happened in a sudden, it just froze and i hardly could turn it on, you will just get the glittering of lights from the screen for a few mins or secs....then it 's gone black...=(



Now, allow me to express my GREAT INDIGNATION here, its about today .....
Revealing my long suppressed dissatisfaction ,frustration, perplexing troubles or feelings that keep encouterin' me ....I was feeling peppy in this morning *although not really cause i slept at 4 sth
but i was actually happy about this sunday cause i got my lappie plus at night i can have dinner with elaine and vanessa....i enjoy dinner with friends very much.

Dinner cancelled - elaine went to ipoh with Serra =(
My Sunday was like you see a black cat crossing your path ...BAD LUCK .....it lingered on me right from the morning i spoke to my mum & dad.
We set off quite late for the qing ming actually, ten sth includin the time my bro dropping by the book store to buy some reference books , the time to NILAI, the time to trap in the jam . Thats also why i got burnt today == Scorching hot sun on top of my head and without an umbrella , also the steaming nasty words from my dad....tough afternoon for me ** I will explain this later...*
So, obviously it's gonna be late and hot when we reached there.....



I was unhappy that we didnt have the time to have BREAKFAST....funny huh....but you see....empty stomach till 1 or 2pm ?? go to nilai , a completely unfamiliar place to grab the lunch....i 'd already forseen the comings...and the dripping sourish gastric juice in my stomach....
BUT mum actually prepared 5 pieces of "daai gou min"....each for one person....but i didnt take it cause i didnt like it *fair enough right......im used to it, to not have breakfast....i was really okay just unhappy for their plan.....but MUM will nag me for being choosy, for not appreciating the food, for not taking my health in concern....




Anywayz, fight started @ here
i was talking with my bro, reading newspaper, mum in the kitchen been yelling at me to take the cup back into the kitchen....alright, i was annoyed and on the way taking my cup inside, met her halfway when she ordered me again to take the cloth on coffee table along ....i was irritated and annoyed....and ignored her...continued walking to the kitchen *** I know it was my fault, obviously.....**and to mention here, i do not like to be yelled or called for many times.....i would keep silent and finish my job ACCORDING to my time and pace.....This ANNOYS my MUM and Dad, i guess
Dad witnessed the part i ignored my mum.....and joined my mum , both *complaining me, criticizing me * ...*i ignored agn* ...finally got in the car and hit the petrol station.....mum started to nag at me agn when dad was filling up the oil tank.....
She said me showing black face cos i cudnt get my breakfast, picky for food * , she said, "do you know how pity for those who are starving, cravin for food ?" only ask you for a lil help to take that cloth ,ya also not willing , selfish lah, dont know to understand and help a mum ......yea yea....but i got PISSED by her denouncing me having black face cus of no breakfast ==.....i didnt show them any bad mood face...& i m okay with myself to be empty stomach till lunch...i didnt help cos i was annoyed and didnt wana stop walking*my fault...'ya always want things in ur way , ur so picky, just go along with whats given ,okay? then...i replied"then the mixed rice stalls dont prepare so many food okay, only one kind is enough, dont choose lah".......

Dad came back in......he said "ya dont have to explain so much for yaself, ive been observing you and caught you many times dragging your job and forget to do this and that""you dont know how to tolerate with others, ya so "hard neck" never accept others and want everything in your way" "I saw you , why is it so difficult for you to take that cloth" Dont gimme too many excuses, ya always talking for yaself " "Parents wont simply put a blame on their children" I explained ....I wasnt unhappy cos i din eat breakf...why make a roar abt me not hving breakf when i myself hve no objection ..and i told him straight off the face i didnt take that cloth cos i was annoyed , on purpose........I know thats my bad habit for forgetting to do my job* i actually do realise that and i really am not doing thaton purpose for forgetting....*but parents wont believe...and thats my bad habit....

After that explaination ,he said "NO.....not true "
I was like WTF ....im telling you the truth, thats my real feeling ...u denied it cause you got the bad image of me set in ur mind and using ur stereotype judgement on me ......
his conclusion " ïm stubborn, selfish, intolerant ,lazy
I said "do you gimme time to change....and you expect me to make a total new transformation at an instant, *cause i think they raised up their voice for this matter has no cure....why dont they keep reminding me, or okay, lets have a firm talk reminder for me, instead of going through this huge world war fight in the car **Dad" within that 10 times, ur 8 times like this , u say lah" i distorted" this is like teenager mistake, i will learn from that, i might change in the future "....dad" 你听过放羊的孩子吗？"
I stunned for a moment.....i almost speechless ,and said " right, he doesnt deserve a chance?....what do u mean now" dad " yeah, you see ,no one will trust a people who lies" .....
omg....my heart was clenched.....cause for me....how can family members act in the same way as the onlookers ...then i replied" ya just dont support " dad" dont support? i support u money, the lappie ..."...me " i dont mean economically....its spiritual support...u wont do that"...and then i kept myself silence for the rest of the afternoon......til the dinner just then, we spoke a bit....
You know what.....i really think NUMB BY LINKIN PARK is just right for me...."every steps that i take is another mistake to you......Ive become so numb...”
you see....support....my friends, can you imagine if he finds out that im GxY......
is this the reason keeping me single? lol nah.....cos im selfish,lazy and intolerant =)
Reached the graveyard.....reach my grandpa's cemetery ....with that terribly hot sun = same temperature as my dad.....dont you think he will get soften after 2 hours....
Without any of us remember the existence of umbrella....he blamed on me....talked so loud till i could hear " Girls are supposed to be careful , cant even do one such tiny thing" ==


I forgot the part he mentioned a real real real immense problem..."I dont know how to communicate with you" " ya always impatient when we wana or try to ask you sth"
Bad attitude huh



How to communicate with me

1. dont ask about my studies, exams.....dont tell me im spending more time on the net
   (every of your concerns and disappointment in "seeing" me neglecting are highly pressuring me )
2. dont tell me you know me,u understand me, u know every bit of me because im your daughter.....cause if you do....then i wont be writin this
3. dont say dat you "eat salts more than i eat rice"and that i always nvr think twice b4 i take actions......dont dont say i never consider for parents, for family....
4. dont trust others and ignore my words ×this one 4get abt it.....
5. im 20 , i talk so harsh with you because i m a bit opinionated or rebellious , against ya conservative thinking.....my siblings are quiet dont mean they agree with ya, they might just scared of ya bad temper only ><

Another reason im Gxy, could i say is due to ya bad temper that i cant stand ?
nah....maybe not because of this....
but i really do hate the bad temper in him....guys like that, or anyone like that please, leave me alone.
My mum is quite conservative i would say, but shes really kind and i think my dad is the very lucky to have her
6. Dont throw a tantrum at mum....i seriously despise any guys do that to girls
eg . me and dad were arguing while on the way to the book store, mum was just being kind to remind my dad to turn left or right, how to get there, he said he knows !! and then he got the wrong way and said thats cause of mum distracting him, 懂都变不懂 .....me "F !"
eg. as i said,they couldnt find food in nilai, dad planned to go back to ulik....alright...then on the way, the time was close to 2, i bet everyone of us was hungry, mum mentioned kajang, coz we gonna passed by, dad then headed into there.....and guess what, when he couldnt find it,he blamed on my mum, why mentioned kajang == me"F!!"

eg ordering food, he said my mum good in knowing good food, let her order ==*ironically, then my mum asked him what he wanted...why the f u wana raise ur voice at mum , “still wana eat rice meh, what time now, eat noodles la, ya know all these well, order la " .....mum of coz beh song la, pull her chair further from him....me ad very further lol

my mum doesnt know how to keep quiet when hes mad ...i seriously think she shouldnt bother his words, its wasteful



but i still LOVE my parents and family....
i just hope everything stay in peace....
understanding.....can exist?



im writin this just to record one of the days in my life =)
I dont angry at them as im used to it....by the time i kept silence, im off to argue with anyone
i hate fighting =) never a solution for anything